FRIENDSHIP
Personal Development
Well-mind
CHOOSE YOUR FRIENDS WISELY
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| image by India friendship. hands |
Written by CHARLENE MIND'JE F.
Place of publication: Kigali-Rwanda
Time reading: 3min
Having friends fosters a sense of belonging: the meaning of life, self-esteem, and, in short, happiness. This means that when it comes to "friends", it is preferable to be aware of the fact that there are various degrees of friendship. You must have different behaviors and expectations for each of these degrees. This is to avoid unpleasant surprises and to nourish unrealistic expectations in connection to the relationship with which you are involved.
Aristotle, the Greek philosopher, said about 2000 years ago: "Friendship is a soul in two bodies. And no one would want to live without friends if they had all of their other possessions"
Yan Joggers, an American sociologist, outlined four distinct levels of friendship, which this article will explain in the most straightforward manner possible to assist you in becoming a well-behaved person while avoiding being a victim of unscrupulous people.
1. BEST FRIEND
He is the friend with a very high regard.With him the relationship has gone through time and trials.It is the one with whom we dare to be who we really are without feeling judged. He is the equivalent of a soul mate in love. Mostly portrayed as the one and only.Also called the essential friend_ your confidant with whom you share your deepest values. And perhaps most crucially.He/She is the ones who loyally stick around, no matter what.
"Nowadays, It is very rare to find these kinds of friends. Especially when you come across them, then these do not last long. Either you leave each other for geographical or professional reasons." says Cynthia_23 years old, during our conversation.
2. CLOSE FRIEND
It is the one with which we will have a particular feeling. We have Certain complicity. The friend with whom we go shares the good times and the bad times, but also family moments, and intellectual and cultural exchanges. As with the best friend, the relationship is based on commitment, confidence, honesty, trust, and community. We share the same states of mind and values but we respect our differences.
In general, we have several close friends.
3. THE ORDINARY FRIEND (ASSOCIATE FRIENDS )
He is more than an acquaintance. He is a good friend, the one we will find at the party, sports, and cultural outings. In short, it is with him that we share the good times. A friend who is based on reciprocal interests, passion, or hobby. These are the people with whom you’re connected through work or a common interest, passion, or hobby. They serve a particular purpose in providing sociability within those contexts—for example, hanging out with you at a class or work happy hour, or chatting with you on a certain platform.
4. THE PSEUDO FRIEND
Even if He/She is sincere and benevolent in the relationship, his friendship is intermittent and self-centered. They are more likely to disappear when a problem arises. On the other hand, they are very quick to solicit you for their troubles
According to Amaryllis, pseudo friends are individuals with whom you have an emotional bond at a certain point in your life. "It's a relationship that requires physical proximity and emotional immediacy to function—and while it's extremely effective in one setting, it loses its value as that context shifts."
You must know how to distinguish in which category your relationship is in order to adjust your expectations. It is often the lack of discernment in the types of relationships we have that bring disappointment and resentment. However, remember that a true friendship is based on 4 essential and reciprocal pillars, involving :
- BENEVOLENCE
- GENEROSITY
- SINCERITY
- LOYALTY
To these 4 pillars, we can add; stimulation, protection, valuation, and affection. If it's not for these pillars, then you can question yourself about your relationship. Besides, you should avoid any types of friendship that do not lead you to self-enjoyment and inner growth/development.
For more details, use this link below to discover 7 types of friends to avoid in order to live your life healthily: https://buddingoptimist.com/types-of-friends-to-avoid/
For more inspiring details, watch this video :
May the one who renews the world at every moment, be the one with whom you connect to always keep morals and hope
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